Shitting my pants!

Well I could have done, literally.

I've not come as close for years and thankfully it has never happened but my goodness, today was nearly the day - and I had white trousers on.

Richard had bought me a ready made meal to heat up, a pasta Italian Carbonara sauce meal which I had for lunch. It was lovely, really tasty and I thought nothing of it until I was just leaving the checkout in Sainsburys this afternoon. The shopping trip had gone well, Tilly had been well behaved and I was feeling good but then all of a sudden, I felt a gurgle and drop like a shuddering pipe inside my stomach. I got to the car, put Tilly in her seat, loaded all the shopping into the car, the stomach cramps were getting far worse at this stage but we don't live too far away so I got behind the wheel and started the engine. I felt terrible and was unsure if I'd make it home. My mind was completely torn, should I get out and go to the loo in Sainsburys? How could I with Tilly? Where would I put her? I couldn't leave her on her own. I could feel myself start to sweat, a mixture of pain, fear and panic. No, I'll go home . . better there . . . not far. I started to reverse and managed to move half way out of the space but as I turned around to look out of the rear window I felt sick, I thought I would almost quite literally shit my white pants. It was no good, I'd never make it home. I got straight out of the car, rushed around and pulled Tilly from her seat, grabbed a trolley and made a fast bee-line for the disabled loo. I wasn't sure if they would let me in, would I need a key? I had to take the trolley with me, to put Tilly in. I was starting to panic that I'd either a) need a key or b)get questioned or c) it be occupied, with the panic of all of these thoughts it got worse. I was in the middle of Sainsburys with white trousers and if anyone stopped me for more than a second I was convinced I was going to shit my pants. Oh my goodness, this was awful. Tilly was squealing with delight at the speed I made my way there and all the people we were passing.

Thank god, it was empty and no one stopped me. I made it just in time as (sorry about this) felt like the world dropped from beneath me. Bloody Italian Carbonara, I liked it but my body obviously didn't! I made my way back through the store, happy with my thankfully pristine white trousers and a confused baby.

Phew. I've not felt like that in years and years. I was petrified that today was the day that I would make the local papers as Siobhán 'Shitty Sainsbury's mum' Harrison.