"Mop and bucket, Sharon. Tears in aisle six!"

Today wasn't as bad as yesterday. I went armed with a toilet roll for the tears and slowly walked with Tilly into the nursery. There was a different nursery nurse there, Mandy, I've met her before and she seems lovely. I popped her down on the floor, we propped some cushions behind her in case she fell backwards and then I could feel the tears start to form in my eyes as Tilly's bottom lip started to protrude. I quickly told them where her bottle was and what time she was due to take it as I rushed out, desperate to get out as quick and possible so I didn't hear her cry. As I walked through the large gates at the front, the tears started. I couldn't go home, so I drove, sobbing all the way to Tescos - I couldn't cry in public. I'd just about composed myself by the time I got there, it was only for an hour. I did some shopping, acutely aware that I had something, or someone missing. I phoned Richard and then I popped over to meet him for a coffee at his work. It was great to see him, we sat and mulled over what she'd be doing. Then it was time to return already, I whizzed over to the nursery, I couldn't wait to see her.
As I arrived, the door to the baby room opened and Tilly was in the same place I'd left her, a tear sat on the top of her cheek but she wasn't crying. I got down on the floor to speak to her, she glanced at me with a vacant stare and looked away. Mandy was updating me on what she'd done and how she'd been and just then she lurched forward and fell flat on her face on the floor! Poor thing, some huge cries started and I picked her up and hugged her better, she was screaming and I really felt for Mandy who looked horrified that the incident had happened in front of me. It was a mistake and there was no harm done, she'll no doubt have many knocks and bumps as she learns to sit, crawl, stand and walk. I sat with her and finished the rest of her bottle feed while I talked to Mandy. Sadly she is not going to be there next Tuesday when Tilly starts as her daughter starts secondary school - so it seems these moments never stop being a mum. Emotional milestones it seems will keep a coming! It was better today, it is going to be hard next week but I'm sure we'll settle in soon enough.